Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Life and Death

Four years ago I was a freshmen in college taking general chemistry. Through frequent study sessions at the LDS Institute of Religion on campus before tests I became acquainted with a girl who was also in my same predicament. She was quickly to become one of my really good friends. Later that year I faced a huge struggle in my life and she was there for me every step of the way, she would listen when I just needed someone to listen, give advice when I needed advice, a shoulder to cry on when I just needed to let it out. Sadly I provided the same for her around that very same time when she found out her father had a brain tumor. We both grew stronger from supporting each other in these trials and have been close friends since. She transferred to another college but we still keep in touch even though lately it hasn't been a lot since she wanted to spend as much time with her father as possible.

Today he passed away.

It wasn't shocking news when I found out, it was bound to happen and he'd already done the impossible by pulling through so many years. Yet I still broke down. I can't even imagine what it would be like, oldest of four, 22, having to be strong for your siblings. Or even her mom, losing her best friend and having all these stresses fall upon you, funeral planning, how to support your family, etc.

I may be weird, but I tend to put myself in others shoes and try to understand their feelings. And in doing that, one of my thoughts was, I wonder if they ever even imagined going through this when they first met and got married. No one every knows what trials and challenges we will face in the future so when I think what those might be for me, I can't, can't imagine at all.

Life is rough. Life is not easy.

Thinking of all this family now has to deal with, I feel all my complaints and stresses right now are nothing in comparison. I hope to never have to go through such an ordeal. Yet the gospel brings knowledge that comforts me in thoughts like this and I know is comforting my friend and her family. Her dad is not gone forever, but only for a short time until in the next life they will all be reunited, and oh what a joyful meeting it will be, I know! And the knowledge that Christ is there to help me through whatever is in store for the future, I know I can make it through anything.

While that was depressing I just needed to get it out. Now I will appreciate the little joys in life even more, for those are what make enduring through the challenges worth it.

Monday, November 19, 2012

1st Anniversary

Wow, one year already?!? It does not seem like it was a little over a year ago Jon and I got married, yet when I think back on all the fun things we did this year it makes sense. To celebrate our one year we decided to finally use a wedding present from one of Jon's uncles which was a weekend to one of his timeshares. We picked Pinetop as our location and the planning began!

The Friday before I went to my lab in the morning ate a quick dollar lunch and headed off to home to pack up for the trip in hopes of leaving by 2. I got home with the car and Jon left to fill it up with oil and change the spark plugs. He said he'd be back in 20 minutes tops and left while I packed up my clothes and such for the weekend and then all the food. I had planned out all the meals and was very excited to make them all! Who needs culinary school when you have the internet to find fun recipes and a husband to cook for? =P So I had finished packing everything up and double checked to make sure I didn't forget anything and Jon still wasn't home, it had been half an hour so I expected him home any minute and waited anxiously for him to come....... finally half an hour later I heard him come up the apartment steps and knock on the door. I opened the door about to ask what had taken so long to find Jon holding a dozen roses and something I had longed for for years.... A 1LB REESES!!!! Really two half pounds to make it the typical two Reeses per package, but still!!!! I was sooooooo excited to see them in their massive peanut butter chocolatey goodness and eat them right there! I have no idea where he found them but it was perfect! And the roses were so pretty, speckled and gorgeous smelling! So gorgeous smelling I held them in my lap the whole time I drove to Gilbert so we could grab a few things from his parents house.

We finally made it up to Pinetop around 9:30, checked in and got settled in our room. It was such a cozy place! A fire place, ipod speakers to play music and a queen sized bed that fell out of the living room wall to snuggle on with hot chocolate while watching the fire. We were both exhausted though and soon fell asleep before we could move to the real bed in the bedroom. Some point in the early morning Jon had woken up to go to the bathroom and then came and woke me up telling me to look out the window. I crawled out of bed and opened the blinds to see snow!!! The ground and trees were covered in a layer of white fluffy snow! In fact it was snowing at that very moment! I was so excited I couldn't sleep much longer but had to get out and explore the winter wonderland outside. Here is some of what I found:

 This is from outside our window


 Outside on the porch


 A site I never thought I'd ever see, our car COVERED in snow!



These were some sweet icicles we found later on in the day


After my adventures I hurried inside to the warmth to make lemon poppy seed pancakes with blackberries and hot chocolate for breakfast. Once we had filled ourselves we drove out to see Ft. Apache and satisfy Jon's history obsession. It was cool to read about and see the different houses people stayed in but you could only go inside one house and then the rest was just walking around and reading plaques. I would have enjoyed it more if it hadn't been freezing cold and super windy outside. We also stopped by the cemetery and it was interesting to read all the names and dates and wonder how their lives were like. There were a lot of war veterans so I felt it was appropriate to remind us of remember those who served/serve our country for Veterans Day. We were finally done being outside in the freezing cold and headed back to town.

 A creek we stopped by along the way

When we got back we looked around for a good place to eat dinner and ended up going to a place called Darbie's Cafe where we had some yummy fried zucchini and shared a fancy burger and panini. We had wanted to get dessert but were WAY to full afterwards, it was delicious food though! On our way home we stopped by a redbox and got War Horse to snuggle in the couch by the fire with some sparkling cider Jon surprised me with and watch. The movie was good but man it had some rough parts to get through, even for Jon! Since we'd had time to let our stomach's settle it was time to break open the giant Reeses!!!






It was just as delectable as it looks!!! I ate one quarter and immediately wanted another so I did even though it was like 1000 calories no joke. I felt fat in thinking I could have eaten another, but after a couple minutes the richness definitely set in and I knew I couldn't eat any more, but boy was that half amazing! 

Sunday our actual anniversary I attempted to make Jon's favorite breakfast, french toast, but haven't had much practice with it since my mom never made it growing up. They were okay but kind of soggy in the middle so I'm going to have to keep practicing those. Jon was a sweetheart and still ate them without complaint. At breakfast I also gave Jon my anniversary gift to him that I had worked on the week before which was an exploding box full of pictures from the year (here is the site I used to make it, its pretty easy actually! And a huge thanks to Melanie for letting me come and borrow her tools and time!).

We then packed avacado chicken salad sandwiches and headed off to his grandma's house in St. Johns to visit since we wouldn't be coming up for Thanksgiving with Jon's family. It was a beautiful scenic ride through the mountains and a great visit with her and her brother. She even had apples on her apple tree for the first time in years that we got to pick and take home. They are really tiny, but so sweet and crunchy I love them! We got to hear some fun stories from his grandma and then headed home when the sun started to set. 

We came home to delicious smelling chicken stew to which I added cornbread dumplings on top to cook as we went outside to try and build a snowman. The snow was still to fluffy though so it was only good for snow angel making and snow dusting each other. We couldn't play too long though because we hadn't packed any gloves and our hands were hurting after only a couple minutes but it was still fun. We warmed up with some hot chocolate and the fire and then had our stew with some more sparkling cider. Once again we were too full for dessert so we saved our wedding cheesecake for after the Muppet movie, which was super cute by the way! A great kid/family movie, we were laughing throughout so highly recommend it!

Then came the moment I was really excited for, eating our wedding cheesecake! Jon's dad didn't think it'd be any good after a year and that made Jon nervous to try it but it smelled so good I couldn't wait to dig in. We both had a bit at the same time and it was sooooo good!!! Once again Melanie for making it and keeping it in your freezer the whole year. Now I know why you were so tempted to eat it all the time. It was the perfect anniversary! I could never get tired of snuggling by a warm fire and looking at the snow outside. We ended up falling asleep in the queen bed again, don't think we ever actually slept in the real bed, I mean why would you when you can sleep by a fire???

It was such a great, relaxing weekend to just be with Jon and not have to think about school or anything but him! I did not want to go back to real life on Monday, but we did a good job distracting ourselves and didn't get home to Tucson until 10 that night. Just in time for Jon to start his four day graveyard shift.... a nice shock back to reality. Oh well, it was a great weekend and anniversary and he won't have to work those shifts much longer and soon have him by me to sleep with every night. It has been such a wonderful first year together. I'm so grateful to have him in my life and can't wait for what adventures will befall us this next year!

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Halloween! Halloween! We love Hallowee-eee-eee-EEEn!!!

So October came around and I decided to try and come up with a super awesome couple's costume for me and Jon to do since it was our first Halloween together. The requirements though made it difficult to come up with because I didn't have a whole lot of time with tests and it had to be cheap too. After a couple weeks I finally saw the perfect one! The couple from UP! it would be perfect!!! Jon already had suits and that sort, we'd just need to get him glasses, me a dress, and some balloons the night of. Even Jon agreed it was a great idea so we were set. Once we had this idea though Jon brought up the fact that we could either be the old couple or the young one and he really wanted to be the cranky old man (no surprise there =P) but then most of the movie his wife is dead... a tragic movie Pixar seems to like those these days. Then an idea popped into my mind, Jon could be the old man and I could be Kevin the bird who WAS a girl it turned out. But Kevin would probably require so much time and money to create something... So I tried to push the idea out of my mind and just focus on dress ideas for the young Elle.

Finally I finished my 3 test week and even though I had a paper and a lab report to do still I needed a break and thought it the perfect time to go to Savers and get our costumes. I quickly found Jon some glasses and a perfect suit jacket for really cheap and then I headed to the dress section. No where did they have anything close to the style of dresses Elle wore in that movie! I was becoming frustrated and decided to go peruse other things they had just in case I might have been able to do Kevin. I had even secretly made a list of things Kevin would require... And to my beautiful surprise I found colored, plastic, ruffled leis and an amazing idea popped into my head. I was going to be Kevin for Halloween and I was so excited!!! I haven't had a really great idea for Halloween in years! So I slowly gathered all my supplies the rest of Thursday and Friday and even got my paper and lab report written by Friday night so that all Saturday I could work on my costume.

Saturday morning I woke up extra early and started my pumpkin chilli for the chilli cook off part of the Halloween party and then headed off to work with all my supplies. Throughout the day when I wasn't on stand guarding for the swim team's invitational I was hot gluing on the leis to a shirt with the help of one of my lifeguard buddies. It turned out perfect! Then thanks to Monica and Jen, the lifeguard, I had some sweet make up and ideas of how to put it on for the night. As soon as we were done cleaning up after those gross kids I ran home, showered, drove to Gilbert to finally be with Jon again (he had been babysitting his siblings all week, of course on one of the hardest weeks of my semester =P), hurriedly we got dressed and ready and headed off for the party!



We looked pretty awesome, don't you think??? I was so happy it turned out! And we even won best over all for the chilli =D Then on actual Halloween we dressed up again though not quite so convincing and got to have $2 booritos at Chipotle and handed out candy corn sugar cookies to trick-or-treaters. I love Halloween!!!

Sunday, September 16, 2012

A Nasty Situation

Soooo this may get a little gross, sorry. Just a forewarning.

About six months after Jon and I got married I felt a little bit of left over glue stuck to my head (Monica did my hair for the wedding and glued in hair extensions so she could do more with my hair and it looked beautiful!). I had tried so hard to wash all the glue out with shampoo for days following the wedding but it was so hard to get out! Frustrated that some was still attached to my head six months after the fact, I quickly picked at it until it came off. Throughout the week I would be running my hand through my hair and find yet another spot, and then the next time another! Each time I would pick the glue off. The most frustrating part was the fact that the glue would suddenly reappear in spots that I had already picked off. What in the world was going on?!? At first I thought maybe just some glue and stayed stuck on, but eventually I began to realize I had probably caused a scab when I picked off the glue the first time and wasn't allowing these scabs to heal over. So I left them alone hoping they would disappear.

They didn't... From my habit of constantly checking my hair I soon began to notice these weird scab-like things spreading along the back of my head. Jon examined them for me and guessed that I probably had some genetic condition his dad and brother had. Apparently there was no cure for it, the condition would just gradually fade away and come back as it pleased. This was not a very outlook for me especially when I soon found out that my mom appeared to have something similar to it.

I would have been fine if my condition was similar to theirs, but it wasn't. It wasn't some little dandruff like flakes on my scalp. They were huge, hard and thick. The best way I can think to describe it, which is what I often imagined was happening was that the skin on my scalp was hardening and flaking off in huge chunks, leaving behind the flesh of my head underneath it. I thought this because I could feel the giant flakes and tried to explore under them but they were so hard and hurt to bend back even a little I could never really feel what was underneath. And it hurt to touch them, bend them back.

After showers my hair would stick to the softness of them and I would have to decrust it from the thick flakes as it dried to prevent the back of my head from looking like I was balding or some disgusting creature. I don't think people ever noticed thankfully but if you even touched the back of my head you would have felt those sharp things. It also made doing my hair fairly difficult. I'd want to put it half up with some bobby pins but they prevented me from sliding them in without feeling like I was ripping my scalp off. So I'd usually just stick with my hair down or in a pony tail. I was grateful for one thing though, the condition I had never spread to my entire scalp, just a circle right at the back. That was just one good thought I had as this tore down my self confidence a bit.

I was just so self conscious about it. My mother in law offered to braid my hair for me once, when it was in the earlier stages of growing, since I was having some difficulty (surprise surprise I still haven't perfected that art on myself =P). I let her do it feeling that she wouldn't run into any of the spots, but low and behold she did. All I could think of was how grossed out she must have been, but too polite to say anything she kept going bless her heart. Also in the earlier stages I got my hair cut and the whole time I just wondered how grossed out the lady must have been and the story she would tell to her coworkers later about it. Needless to say I haven't gotten a hair cut since, especially since it got worse.

Finally after dealing with this for a couple months I finally found the time to set up a general doctor's appointment with the UofA Campus Health. I was embarrassed to have to show the doctor my ugly head and was terrified at the same time it would be what Jon thought and there wouldn't be any treatment. But lo and behold it wasn't!!! I was SOOO happy!!!! I wouldn't have to live as some gross creature feared by all my whole life! He gave me a steroid ointment to rub in my head once a day and shampoo to rub in before showering. Jon was so wonderful to put the ointment on my head every night, I know it wasn't the prettiest thing he's seen from me but he offered and never complained about helping me out with that every night. In fact he offered the very first time! I was so grateful.

 After the first two days of the treatment there was little improvement but then the third and fourth day it was HUGE improvement. The only down side with this improvement was a seemed to be losing a TON of hair. At the beginning of the third day I thought not much of it as I pulled some flakes that had detached off and they took a bit of hair with them. But then when I showered, globs of hair came off on my hands when I was washing my hair. Then it happened again the fourth day and I was afraid by the end I would have a big bald spot where I had been applying the ointment. I always wondered how cancer patients dealt with losing their hair and never thought I could handle it, this proved that fact I believe. I was beginning to become devastated again, but luckily after the fourth day the dramatic loss of hair stopped.

Now after a week of pony tails to hide the greasy ointment spot on my head that wouldn't wash out I have my scalp back!!! Its an amazing feeling to run my fingers through my hair again and not feel that nasty crusty stuff! I'm gradually washing out the ointment and soon I'll be able to wear my hair down conscious free! I am sooo grateful that there was a treatment for what I had and that it actually worked! I'm also extremely thankful to all Jon did in helping me with everything through this especially put on the ointment every night.

Hope it wasn't too gross, I just had to get out everything I've been through with this and writing it in my journal would have taken forever.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Where did all the summertime go?

Summer. The months I look forward to and now their gone. I expected to be working two jobs with only Sundays to really relax and enjoy myself, along with my mother's amazing homemade ice creams. Looking back I actually got to do quite a lot of fun things which I wasn't expecting. Here's the list of funness:

* Honeymooning (Disneyland, California Adventure, Six Flags and Vegas)
* Biathlon with my sisters (Who have now surpassed me in doing a triathlon, along with Scott. They are amazing! Maybe next year I wont be so poor and experience the pain and suffering too. Except I'll opt out on doing it with strep/bronchitis like Melanie =P)
* Warp Tour (Though ridiculously hot, me and Jon had quite a blast and got to see some fun bands like New Found Glory and Yellow Card)
* Vegas trip with the Patterson's (We got to stay in a Presidential Suite in the Cosmo! It was pretty dang fancy. They had some nice food and fun pools. Also got to walk the strip and see some cool sites like the Belagio fountain. Then on the way home we stopped by and walked around the Hoover Dam which I would never want to fall down from! I'm starting to see Mom in myself as I shied away from getting to close to the edge. It was super windy okay? But I forced myself to not chicken out =P)
* Made homemade ice cream myself! (I made peach ice cream for a church ice cream party that turned out delicious! And then had some left over half-and-half to make some chocolate peanut butter for a friend get together. That one was AMAZING!!! But also super rich so you couldn't eat a lot, probably a good thing though.)
* Random trip to Sedona (A family friend of Jon and also our bishop randomly offered us to stay for the weekend at their timeshare in Sedona, since for some reason unknown they couldn't go. Never been before so of course we said yes! We hauled along Jon's friend Jason and his girlfriend to our adventure. For the one day we had we decided to go to Slide Rock, which I've wanted to go since hearing about such an awesome place my Senior year of highschool. It was even better than what I imagined though it looked nothing like what I had. It was gorgeous and so much fun! We all had our share of slips and falls too. After around two hours of bruising, scraping and freezing our bodies we decided it was time to go. Definitely recommend this place to anyone with time in Sedona! But probably only for summer and the afternoon during then because the water was super cold.)
* Finally set up my house (As I said in the last post, I finally got some free time to clean and finally organize my apartment to look like a home. A home!!! I love it so much!)
* Made real dinners (This is what I was most excited/loved doing this summer and will greatly miss it! Sunday I guess I can have time but it was really nice to do three to four times a week.)

And that was summer! I miss it already, but for now bring on the school and homework, all 20 credits of it. Hopefully I survive...

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Free Time!!!!!

August 1st was my last day of lifeguarding and while it was bittersweet, I was more excited for the 'sweet' part, FREE TIME!!! I was finally only going to be working 20 hours instead of 56 which would mean I could get home at 11 and get cleaning/ setting up my apartment done. Something I have been dreaming of doing since we moved in and never really got to 'move in.' So yesterday I cleaned up the living room and not having nails just set our pictures on top of the couches. It actually looks pretty good. There is so much clear space and with the pictures its starting to look like a home! I'm so excited. Then today I'm working on the kitchen. I got the table and around the table all cleared off so now I can actually use it to help when cooking or doing dishes which will be SO nice! We still don't have chairs, but we do have two comfy love seats to sit on =)

Tomorrow I will tackle the bathroom, then Friday I will organize our room, and Saturday will be the closet. I'M SO EXCITED!!! Now I can have people over and actually have a homely looking apartment. So come on over, the door is open!

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Oooooh what a night!

Points to anyone who got the song I was trying to refer to here =P

Anyways it was a crazy night. I had big plans to make Spicy Chicken Rigatoni for dinner tonight and was super excited about it. I had everything going great, the ground red pepper and minced garlic were smelling so wonderful and it was nice and rainy outside when all of the sudden... the power went off. So the stove got cold just in the middle of me cooking my chicken. Luckily it didn't last long and the chicken was done cooking in no time. Now to add the marinara sauce... oh wait we don't have any! I had bought a lot and Jon never wants spaghetti so it never crossed my mind he would have used it all up with his mini pizza making. So I ran to the store and bought some marinara sauce in a can since it was the cheapest.

Get home all excited to finally get this made, because the chicken cooking in the seasonings smelled SOOO GOOD!!! I take the can to our electric can opener that Jon had gotten at Goodwill. I secretly hate that thing because I can never get it to work on my first try and this time was no different... except this time it decided I broke it. Frustrated I stormed off to the dollar store where Jon claimed they had manual can openers, the kind I prefer. Luckily they did but not for a dollar which was lame because that's the point of being a 99cent store right? But it was still a good price for what it was and I headed home wondering what other mishap would befall me next. Thankfully there were none! Once home I quickly reheated the stove, added the marinara sauce along with alfredo and got to eat! It was soooo yummy! Making it was a terror but way worth it! If you want to try it, which you really should, here is the link: http://www.tastebook.com/recipes/2423433-Spicy-Chicken-Rigatoni?full_recipe=true